Uncomfortable to write about this

Let me take you into this “s*xual” experience in the Hathor Temple.

After a four hour drive I arrive at the Hathor Temple again. The place where we ended our journey. Only this time I am alone. Jethro took the plane home from Cairo yesterday morning.

I felt so strongly that I had to go here again. And the experience this time was so different. Last time was magical, but this was mind blowing.

First I walked outside and around the temple, which I hadn't done the last time. Quite quickly a temple guard comes walking by, which is not strange, because that happens quite often. Especially when you are poking around in closed spaces. That doesn't mean you can't go in, because hey... it's Egypt. With money everything can be arranged.

Only this temple guard was really nice. He invited me for a ritual to connect with Isis, to receive a blessing in love (as it turned out).

In the first room I walked down a staircase. There I cleaned myself. Which was special in itself.

Then we walked to the second room, which is actually a leftover door outside, where I was allowed to stand a gate. I tuned in and I got the message that this was to ask for a blessing in love. Turned out to be confirmed by the temple guard afterwards.

And then we walked to the third room.. a smaller temple focused on Isis. A prayer building. The man gave me the key. Does this mean I can open the door to Isis? That feels like an honor. Even though they probably do that with many more visitors. For me this feels like an energetic opening to Isis.

I open the door and voila. There she is. Isis. I am told what I am allowed to do to undergo the ritual. But actually I am immediately overwhelmed by the energy. How serene, loving and powerful this feels. I place my head against the wall, under Isis. And I feel her energy flowing through me.

When I take a few steps back to recover from this energy transfer I look up. I look straight into the eyes of Hathor…. Again all the energy shoots through my body. And I stand shaking on my legs.

After this ritual I decide to enter the temple. The same man was still walking with me. He brought me to a room for which I had to climb a staircase. To crawl through a small hole.

At the end of the hallway I see Hathor on the wall. I feel her energy. She is alive in the energy. And it is as if she is looking right at me and saying “come to me Brian”.

I move slowly toward her. I tremble. I shake. My chest heaves forward and back, nearly causing me to fall over. I feel darkness being pulled out of me. 

Very consciously, step by step, I move forward. Almost at her I can do nothing but kneel. Not from a “worshipping”, but from a respect. I feel a deep mutual conversation. We are equal here.

When I get that message, I hear my head “stand up, you can touch me”. I stand up and move closer to the wall. The moment I touch her, an energy shoots through me, which I recognize from tantra. A s*xual energy. A life energy. An excitement.

I can still hear myself thinking “does Hathor on the wall turn me on?”, but I decide to surrender. I make the decision to surrender and then it happens.

It's like I'm completely taken over by her energy. My head against hers. The energy in my hip area increases and my hips and lingam are pressed against the wall.

My mind intervenes for a moment, because “what is happening here?”. I hear “it’s okay, just let go”. At that moment the sexual energy shoots through my lingam and my entire body. I even notice that my body is pushing closer to the wall with Hathor on it. I feel my energy mixing with hers. As if she is standing opposite me and I am completely absorbed in her. As if an energetic sexual energy transfer is taking place.

And as I experience this, a thought comes to mind, “Am I seriously having energetic sex with a wall that has Hathor on it?”

Again I hear “it’s okay, just let go”. The energy keeps shooting through my body. Through my lingam, inwards, up to my crown. The body full of excitement. It vibrates and shakes.

No idea how long this whole experience lasted, but at some point it stops. I hear a voice again. This time the voice says "your initiation is finished, you may go now".

I'm kind of bummed that it's over, because apart from the fact that it's mystical and magical, which I already enjoy. There's all that s*xual energy, which we can also call life energy or life force, super nice of course.

I walk quietly to the back. I feel blown away. I feel grateful. I feel wonderful. I realize that I am super happy that I listened to my feelings and went to this temple again. What an experience.

After visiting two more tombs I decide to leave the temple. After the Isis initiation and the Hathor initiation I feel that my system is ready.

I walk outside and I look back one more time. “What happened here, wow, this is so magical”.

And besides that, all I can think is “if only Esther were here, because this experience is guaranteed to set the fire under the sheets”. I think Hathor is part of our love life from now on

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